this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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