dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
there's paper in my vomit.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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