Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
