I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
