I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
