Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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