"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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