i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
