He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
