Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
So vagazzling was a success
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
