how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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