If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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