I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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