I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
