Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
