it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize