I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
