yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
