College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
