Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
