Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
