I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
