wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
