Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
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