Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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