Non-Jews are for practice
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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