lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
