i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
