she takes plan B like it's going out of style
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
