K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
