i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
