how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
You've changed since you got that strap on
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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