Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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