I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
