chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize