You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
