pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
this just has baby written all over it
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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