hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
