Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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