Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
