If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Randomize
