tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
