I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
a search helicopter?!
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
