Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
