If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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