I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
