grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
