Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
