hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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