the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
You're earring is so big in my mouth
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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