he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
